The Argument Against Evolution

Posted on April 22, 2010

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A very good example here of the gap theory argument against the Theory of Evolution. (The idea that the gaps in knowledge invalidate the theory).

Mr. Creationist: Do you speak English?

Miss Evolution: Yes, I do.

Mr. C: So what does “misology” mean?

Miss E: I don’t know.

Mr C: Ha! Then you don’t speak English!

Miss E: (confused) Umm…I don’t follow you.

Mr C: (Triumphant) You don’t know what misology means, therefore you don’t speak English.

Miss E: No, hang on…What does misology mean anyway?

Mr C: (Evasive) Well, I don’t know either, but the point is you don’t know therefore you don’t speak English.

Miss E: But-

Mr C: (Beaming) Furthermore, as I have now proved you cannot speak English it follows that you must speak French!

Miss E: I….excuse me? Wait, wait…Even if I don’t speak English, why does that mean I speak French? What about…Spanish? Or Chinese?

Mr C: (Patiently) Ah, those aren’t true languages.

Miss E: (Silence)

Mr C: (Continuing with gusto) French is the only true language.

Miss E: But there are thousands of languages, there’ve been thousands of languages! Latin, Chochenyo, Tillamook…

Mr C: (Shaking head, grinning) Ahh, those are dead languages. French is a living language! People who speak things like Arabic and Chinese are mistaken and are going to go to Hell. I believe in the one true language, French!

Miss E: So, even though I know thousands of thousands of words in English and can construct clear, meaningful sentences, I don’t speak English because I don’t know what misology means?

Mr C: Yep.

Miss E: (consults dictionary). It means “fear of reason”. Do I speak English now?

Mr C: (Pondering) Hmmm, fine. (Checks own dictionary) What does “incogitant” mean?

Miss E: (Shaking head) You got me.

Mr C: (Triumphant) You don’t speak English! Praise be to French!

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